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Table of Contents Table of Contents Trending Videos Close this video playerAttachment styles are characterized by different ways of interacting and behaving in relationships. During early childhood, these attachment styles center on how children and parents interact. In adulthood, attachment styles describe attachment patterns in romantic relationships.
The concept of attachment styles grew from attachment theory and the research that emerged throughout the 1960s and 1970s. Today, psychologists typically recognize four main attachment styles: secure, ambivalent, avoidant, and disorganized.
Attachment styles are patterns that emerge in our earliest emotional bonds with caregivers. These early attachment styles play an important role in child development and also influence attachment patterns in adult relationships. Knowing more about which style you have (secure, ambivalent, avoidant, or disorganized) can help you better recognize the challenges you might face in your romantic relationships.
Attachment is a special emotional relationship that involves an exchange of comfort, care, and pleasure. The roots of research on attachment began with Freud's theories about love, but another researcher named John Bowlby is usually credited as the father of attachment theory.
John Bowlby devoted extensive research to attachment, describing it as a "lasting psychological connectedness between human beings." Bowlby shared the psychoanalytic view that early experiences in childhood are important for influencing development and behavior later in life.
Our early attachment styles are established in childhood through the infant/caregiver relationship.
In addition to this, Bowlby believed that attachment had an evolutionary component; it aids in survival. He believed that this propensity to make strong emotional bonds with specific individuals was an essential part of human nature.
Bowlby believed that there are four distinguishing characteristics of attachment:
Bowlby also made three key propositions about attachment theory:
Consistent Care Leads to Trust
First, he suggested that when children are raised with confidence that their primary caregiver will be available to them, they are less likely to experience fear than those raised without such conviction.
Early Experiences are Critical
Secondly, he believed this confidence is forged during a critical development period, infancy, childhood, and adolescence. The expectations formed during that period tend to remain relatively unchanged for the rest of the person's life.
Expectations Stem from Experiences
Finally, he suggested that these expectations that are formed are directly tied to experience. In other words, children develop expectations that their caregivers will be responsive to their needs because, in their experience, their caregivers have been responsive in the past.
During the 1970s, psychologist Mary Ainsworth further expanded upon Bowlby's groundbreaking work in her now-famous "Strange Situation" study. The study involved observing children between the ages of 12 to 18 months responding to a situation in which they were briefly left alone and then reunited with their mother.
Ainsworth's Strange Situation Assessment followed this basic sequence:
Based on these observations, Ainsworth concluded that there were three major styles of attachment: secure attachment, ambivalent-insecure attachment, and avoidant-insecure attachment.
Researchers Main and Solomon added a fourth attachment style known as disorganized-insecure attachment.
Numerous studies have supported Ainsworth's conclusions and additional research has revealed that these early attachment styles can help predict behaviors later in life.
Before you start blaming relationship problems on your parents, it is important to note that attachment styles formed during early childhood are not necessarily identical to those demonstrated in adult romantic attachments.
It's important to remember that a lot of time has elapsed between infancy and adulthood. All of those intervening experiences also play a significant role in shaping adult attachment styles.
Those described as ambivalent or avoidant during childhood can become securely attached as adults, while those with a secure attachment in childhood can show insecure attachment patterns in adulthood. Basic temperament is also thought to play a partial role in attachment.
So what role might factors such as divorce or parental discord play in forming attachment styles? In one study, researchers found that parental divorce seemed unrelated to attachment style.
Instead, their research indicated that the best predictor of adult attachment style was the perceptions that people have about the quality of their relationships with their parents as well as their parent's relationship with each other.
However, research in this area indicates that childhood patterns have an important impact on later relationships. The researchers also found varied beliefs about relationships amongst adults with differing attachment styles.
While we cannot say that early attachment styles are identical to adult romantic attachment, research has shown that early attachment styles can help predict behavior patterns in adulthood.
Subsequent research does suggest that parental divorce or abandonment does have an impact on adult children's attachment styles. Parental divorce or abandonment is linked to more negative feelings about romantic relationships as a higher likelihood of having an anxious and avoidant attachment style.
Children who are securely attached generally become visibly upset when their caregivers leave and are happy when their parents return. When frightened, these children will seek comfort from the parent or caregiver.
Securely attached children readily accept contact initiated by a parent, and they greet the parent's return with positive behavior. While these children can be comforted to some extent by other people in the absence of a parent or caregiver, they clearly prefer parents to strangers.
Parents of securely attached children tend to play more with their children. Additionally, these parents react more quickly to their children's needs and are generally more responsive to their children than the parents of insecurely attached children.
Studies have shown that securely attached children are more empathetic during later stages of childhood. These children are also described as less disruptive, less aggressive, and more mature than children with ambivalent or avoidant attachment styles.
While forming a secure attachment with caregivers is normal and expected, as Hazan and Shaver have noted, it doesn't always happen. Researchers have found a number of different factors that contribute to the development (or lack thereof) of secure attachment, particularly a mother's responsiveness to her infant's needs during the first year of a child's life.
Mothers who respond inconsistently or who interfere with a child's activities tend to produce infants who explore less, cry more, and are more anxious. Mothers who consistently reject or ignore their infant's needs tend to produce children who try to avoid contact.
As adults, securely attached people tend to have trusting, long-term relationships. Other key characteristics of securely attached individuals include:
Securely attached adults have better interpersonal relationships, higher levels of autonomy, a sense of purpose, and high levels of self-acceptance.
How many people classify themselves as securely attached? In a classic study by Hazan and Shaver, 56% of respondents identified themselves as secure, while 25% identified as avoidant, and 19% as ambivalent/anxious.
Children who are ambivalently attached tend to be extremely suspicious of strangers. These children display considerable distress when separated from a parent or caregiver but do not seem reassured or comforted by the parent's return.
In some cases, the child might passively reject the parent by refusing comfort or may openly display direct aggression toward the parent.
According to some older research, ambivalent attachment is relatively uncommon, with only 7% to 15% of infants in the United States displaying this attachment style.
In a review of ambivalent attachment literature, Cassidy and Berlin also found that observational research consistently links ambivalent insecure attachment to low maternal availability. As these children grow older, teachers often describe them as clingy and over-dependent.
As adults, those with an ambivalent attachment style often feel reluctant about becoming close to others and worry that their partner does not reciprocate their feelings. This leads to frequent breakups, often because the relationship feels cold and distant.
These individuals feel especially distraught after the end of a relationship. Cassidy and Berlin described another pathological pattern where ambivalently attached adults cling to young children as a source of security.
Children with avoidant attachment styles tend to avoid parents and caregivers. This avoidance often becomes especially pronounced after a period of absence.
These children might not reject attention from a parent, but neither do they seek out comfort or contact. Children with an avoidant attachment show no preference between a parent and a complete stranger.
As adults, those with an avoidant attachment tend to have difficulty with intimacy and close relationships. These individuals do not invest much emotion in relationships and experience little distress when a relationship ends.
They often avoid intimacy by using excuses (such as long work hours) or may fantasize about other people during sex. Research has also shown that adults with an avoidant attachment style are more accepting and likely to engage in casual sex.
Other common characteristics include failure to support partners during stressful times and an inability to share feelings, thoughts, and emotions with partners.
Children with a disorganized-insecure attachment style show a lack of clear attachment behavior. Their actions and responses to caregivers are often a mix of behaviors, including avoidance or resistance.
These children are described as displaying dazed behavior, sometimes seeming either confused or apprehensive in the presence of a caregiver.
Researchers suggest that inconsistent behavior on the part of parents might be a contributing factor in this attachment style. Parents who act as figures of both fear and reassurance to a child contribute to a disorganized attachment style.
Because the child feels both comforted and frightened by the parent, confusion results.
Adults with a disorganized attachment style also exhibit a confusing mix of anxious and avoidant behaviors in relationships. They have a strong need for a close connection with a romantic partner yet struggle to open up and be vulnerable.
People with a disorganized style may seek out a loving relationship and then suddenly push the other person away. They often sabotage their relationships and have a hard time trusting their partners.
This style is often associated with unhealthy relationships marked by toxicity, clinginess, poor communication, and even abuse.
If you're unsure about your attachment style, this fast and free quiz can help you identify what your thoughts and behaviors may say about your attachment.
This attachment styles quiz was reviewed by David Susman, PhD.While adult romantic attachments may not exactly correspond with early childhood attachments, there is no question that our earliest relationships with caregivers play a role in development. By better understanding the role of attachment, you can gain a greater appreciation of how the earliest attachments in your life may impact adult relationships.
12 SourcesVerywell Mind uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Read our editorial process to learn more about how we fact-check and keep our content accurate, reliable, and trustworthy.
By Kendra Cherry, MSEd
Kendra Cherry, MS, is a psychosocial rehabilitation specialist, psychology educator, and author of the "Everything Psychology Book."
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